Pros And Cons Of Not Asking For Custody Of Your Children
by Jo Rodriquez
When you and your spouse are divorcing and the topic of custody of your children comes up, it's common for both of you to make claims as to why you'd each be the better choice. It may seem a little unorthodox, therefore, to suggest to your attorney that you don't want to have custody of your children. Your attorney can discuss how such a claim will play out, and this discussion will typically include a mention of these pros and cons.
Pro: Provides Stability For Your Children
While plenty of children of divorced parents can successfully split their time between the homes of each parent, it's easy to argue that this routine creates some upheaval for the kids. When you decide that you don't want to pursue custody of your children, a big benefit is that they'll have more stability in their lives by remaining with your ex-spouse on a full-time basis.
Con: You'll Seldom Get To See Them
While there are a number of different custody and visitation scenarios that can play out, the reality is that if you choose not to pursue custody of your children, you may rarely get to see them. Even if you feel as though you're not a good fit for getting custody, you might like the idea of seeing your kids as much as possible. In some scenarios, this may be difficult.
Pro: You'll Generate Favor With Your Ex-Spouse
Many divorce and subsequent child custody proceedings can be filled with vitriol, so it's always nice to take a stand that won't worsen the relationship that you have with your ex-spouse. If he or she is determined to get custody and you essentially state that you won't fight him or her in this area, you'll commonly generate some goodwill with your decision. This can make future interactions between the two of you easier than they'd be if you had vigorously fought for custody.
Con: It May Be Difficult To Get Custody In The Future
Situations change, and there may come a time that you feel as though you'd like joint custody of your children. If you go to court with your ex-spouse again on this matter, the judge will know that you denied wanting custody in the past, and he or she may find that it's difficult to grant you custody now. If you're thinking about not asking for custody right away, it's ideal if you don't think that you'll eventually change your mind.
For more information, contact an attorney at a local firm like Karen Robins Carnegie PLC.
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